Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house. - Jean Kerr
The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible. - Jean Kerr
I don't want to see the uncut version of anything. - Jean Kerr
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me they are wonderful things for other people to go on. - Jean Kerr
Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them. - Jean Kerr
Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself-like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks. - Jean Kerr
I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas? - Jean Kerr
One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is that assumption on the part of the staff that because you have lost your gall bladder you have also lost your mind. - Jean Kerr
Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he _becomes_ polite. - Jean Kerr
Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze? - Jean Kerr
The only reason that they say, 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats. - Jean Kerr